The Marshmallow Test:
A Lesson in Self-Leadership
John Maxwell once said, “The toughest person to lead is yourself.” I couldn’t agree more. Every day, I find myself deep in conversation with my inner self, navigating a series of choices that determine the course of my day and, ultimately, my life.
The questions are simple, yet they carry profound weight in my head:
- Will I delay gratification today for the sake of greatness?
- Will I commit to my disciplined 20/20/20 routine?
- 20 minutes of morning solitude and prayer,
- 20 minutes of reading,
- 20 minutes planning my day around my top three priorities.
- Will I find time for a workout?
- Will I choose healthy meals and snacks?
- Will I give my best effort at work, or will I take the easy way out?
- Will I stick to my commitment to not eat past 8 PM and avoid screens an hour before bed?
What I’ve come to realize is that life often boils down to two fundamental choices:
- The Easy Path: Opting for instant gratification.
- The Road Less Traveled: Choosing delayed gratification.
You may have heard of the famous Stanford Marshmallow Test. In this study, a group of four-year-olds was given a simple choice: eat one marshmallow now, or wait until the researcher returned and receive two marshmallows instead. Fourteen years later, those who chose to wait—who delayed their gratification—were more likely to get along better with peers, handle conflict more effectively, and pursue their goals with greater persistence.
Here’s the good news:
As your coach, mentor, and friend, I encourage you to start small. Choose one area of your life where you can build the habit of taking the road less traveled. Perhaps it’s something as simple as setting a consistent bedtime or committing to 10 minutes of quiet reflection each morning. Whatever it is, let it be a small step toward strengthening your self-discipline and reinforcing your commitment to personal growth.
Remember, as Brian Tracy wisely put it: “The ability to discipline yourself to delay gratification in the short term in order to enjoy greater rewards in the long term is the indispensable prerequisite for success.”
Here’s to making the tough choices and reaping the lasting rewards.
The journey won’t always be easy, but it will always be worth it.
– Steve
As a master storyteller, Steve has unparalleled ability to communicate dynamic business and leadership truths through stories, anecdotes and humor. Harness the power of the “number one” predictor of professional success, impact, leadership, high performance and sustainable relationships in business and life. Steve’s highest rated keynote presentation.
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About the Author
Steve Gutzler is the President of Leadership Quest, a Seattle-based leadership development company. Steve is a dynamic, highly-sought-after speaker who has delivered more than 2,500 presentations to a list of clients including Microsoft, Starbucks, the Seattle Seahawks, Pandora Radio, Boeing, Cisco, Starwood Corporation, the Ritz Carlton group, and the U.S. Social Security Administration. He recently was voted #1 by the readership of Huffington Post as the Most Inspirational Leader on Social Media.
A published author on leadership and emotional intelligence, Steve resides near Seattle with his wife Julie where they enjoy time with their three adult children and six grandchildren.